Sunday, October 11, 2009

Are you afraid of the dark?

Something I've never been able to grow out of is my need to stay up as late as possible, even if it's to my detriment. Getting up at 7:00 am? Going to bed before 1:00 would be a sacrifice, but I could try. After all, I gotta be responsible.

It's about seven minutes to 2:00 am to be exact and I'm still up (not typing in my sleep or anything. Dear me, no.) I have every reason in the world to get some shut eye, and yet here I am. The cats, I can tell, want me to go to bed. They sleep with me at night, and they're both bookending me, getting all in my business.

Here's the thing, though. I'm kinda sorta afraid of the dark and stuff. The Dude is in London (Ontario, not England) with his brother and brother's family. I'm going in the morning, where we'll be doing ye olde Thanksgiving dinner. He went a day early because he could. I've enjoyed having the place to myself to do such wild things as eat leftovers, wash the dishes and read my book. But I'm not looking forward to sleeping alone here for the first time.

I've never been a fan of that, really. As a kid I hated being alone in the dark in my own room. I didn't like it as a teenager, I didn't like it when I lived alone, I didn't like it nights away from whatever boyfriend I had, I didn't like it between boyfriends and I don't much care for it now.

Lucky for me, the Dude only makes these sort of jaunts once in awhile. They're planned in advance and I always know how long I have to suck it up.

You'd think being an adult, I would be able to just get over these silly feelings. It would be so sensible and orderly of me to go to bed at 11:00, and I do love me some sensible and orderly behaviour. I really do.

Well, it's 2:02 am now. I suppose I ought to scoop up Smokey and drag my sorry ass (and his) into bed. Having him there with me will actually be a comfort. No one is alone who has a cat. Or a small dog. Or a larger dog that doesn't hog the bed. Or a parrot that keeps you company during the day, but knows its place and lets you get some sleep. But not fish. They're not much for companionship, not with you. They just don't give a damn.

Goodnight.

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