The Merge

The Dude and I have merged our finances. It just got to a point where it was simply easier.

He's the sort of guy who's more impulsive, likes to spend his money on what I like to call "bubblegum and baseball cards". You know, juvenile foolishness like snacks and figurines and stuff like that. Not that I don't like to spend money on frivolous things, myself, I just happen to be able to say no to things easier and keep in mind my monthly bills, obligations and such. He'll see a few hundred dollars in his account and not think about his future needs.

So now our rent, utilities, cell phones, the Dude's student loan, kitten expenses, food and entertainment all get handled by me with money that we're both putting into one pot. I'll also be able to delegate wedding expenses, savings and the Dude's tax savings (Being freelance, he's got to pay his income taxes all in one go come tax time).

It's a lot of extra work, but I don't care. We'll save more money, I'll be able to manage our long-term plans and we're no longer keeping tabs on who owes the other how much. It's more loving and romantic. And since the Dude needs to be able to blow some cash on his nonsense but doesn't trust himself with large sums, he requested an allowance of sorts. So that's what we're doing.

I personally couldn't handle being on his end, having him manage the money (Probably because it's not his forte), but he's a happy camper, being able to finally not worry about money at all. All he has to do is deposit his cheque and then the rent gets paid, the internet and TV stay on, his cell and student loan get paid, there's always enough for groceries and TTC tokens, we go out to dinners and movies, and he can still spend his own cash without any issues.

I'm not really on a budgeted allowance, myself. In the past, because I was making more reliable money, I'd handle dinners out, movies and little extras. I'd also then get myself things for my own happiness. In the end, the Dude was blowing more of his money on the nonsense, I was taking us out and I was feeling free to buy myself all sorts of loveliness.

Now I'm going to be more restrained because I'm managing our money, not just mine, and from our money I need to also bump up our savings and pay for a wedding.

I never thought I'd feel this way, but honestly, if we want to meet our goals for the future, I don't see a better alternative. Not having the full weight of my personal income to use at my leisure is a loss, yes. But it's a minor loss. I'm not troubled by it and I don't feel the lack of independence I thought I'd feel. I actually feel closer to the Dude. I feel like instead of trying to balance and juggle two separate budgets, I'm now bringing us together. It's not been long at all, but the change in attitude between us has shifted in a positive way.